Goose News

Ahhh, the Canada Goose. That bird that wears the moniker of our great country – flying majestically in extended V’s across the spring and autumn skies, often heard before they are seen. The mother goose who is willing to defend her eggs and chicks even to death if necessary. Their stark contrasting colors that separate them from the other geese making them instantly recognizable. What a beautiful stately bird that so represents the aquatic life.

And then there is the city goose!

A dirty mongrel of a bird – too stupid to fly south for the winter – eating pesticide infested grasses – crapping everywhere and generally a nuisance. Arrogant too! Drive toward one and rather than moving they will try to stare you down; only moving when the outcome of the stare down will obviously result in a bad situation of bird on bumper.

We have some lovely parks and marina areas around here that are virtually useless due to the disgusting accumulation of slippery city goose poop.

This one has forgotten how to fly properly. Rather than landing into a headwind as per the Gander Manual, he decided to attempt the difficult and somewhat dangerous crosswind landing. Things went well right up to the loss of control inherent to crosswind landings that resulted in an uncoordinated careen into dock A. Net result: a broken wing. (Later in the day after this photo was taken, this city goose was collected and brought to a local animal hospital. Current condition – unknown.)

Now what do we do with them? Can’t ‘remove’ them – send them on a permanent vacation so to speak as this would offend those with a love for animals (no matter how much their love hurts the animal.) Can’t just move them – they can fly – and eventually do so – right back to your dock. So what is the answer? Birth control for birds? Maybe… but until some solution is found – our waterways and shorelines will be partly ruined by their unsightly mess and the strut of the City Goose.